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What, or who, is a bastard?

Question: What is a bastard exactly?
Quite often we ask ourselves hard to answer questions, like, 
"What is a bastard?"
And we wax philosophic with metaphysical postulations, incomplete aphorisms, and inconsistent sophisms that make one more and more sure that the only true thing is that a picture is worth a thousand words.
In the photo below, the guy on the right is a member of a bomb squad in the middle of a deactivation. 
The guy behind him, well, he's a bastard.


(Regrettably I cannot remember where I first found this and thus no credit is given to the originator.)